click here to RSVP
]]>
I won’t pretend to ‘feel where you’re coming from’. I won’t pretend to ‘get it’ as both would be lies, but I am writing in hopes of translating to you the message of love—more specifically, self-love—more specific than that, radical self-love. I, like you, am a black person living in America. Those two identities alone send many to an early grave. But something I am not is a black male-bodied person living in America so I won’t pretend to ‘understand’.
I won’t belabor you with in depth recaps about your recent media involvement or even about this most recent incident when you were reportedly arrested in an attempt to solicit a male prostitute—as you, unlike the rest of us, were present for it all. I would like to focus less on your actions and more on the things that it seems you are not doing—or perhaps unable to fathom. I’m not here to place a label on your or your sexuality. I’m certainly not here to judge your actions.
Enough people have those jobs on lock. I would, however, like you to know that who you are is amazing. Whoever your authentic self is. He’s amazing. If he loves men. If he loves women. If he loves men and women. If he loves neither men nor women, but a blend of the two. You’re amazing. Far too seldom does the world tell us that. And given the larger social think regarding black male (non-hetero) sexuality, I doubt many people have affirmed you in possibly having a non-hetero sexuality—especially given your profession; one that is hyper-masculine, male-dominated, and straight.
Overall this letter isn’t about your sexuality, per se. It’s more so about what seems to be an inability to be your authentic self (which is partially manifesting as a battle with your sexuality) versus your fictional self. Whether or not you’re gay isn’t what truly matters, but it’s clear to me and the rest of the world that you deeply struggle with being ALL of who Calvin LeBrun truly is; the ways in which you skirt around questions in your interviews, the ways that you choose to answer questions when you do answer them, that your ability to pick up gay/trans-gender men is ‘dumb luck’, and the fact that you have been found engaging in sexual acts with males thrice, yet you deny having a fluid sexuality.
It is those things coupled with the ever-present questions, “In what other areas is he choosing to let his fictional self be seen as opposed to his authentic self?” and “How does this lack of access granted to his authentic self, impact his spirit man and psyche?” that have inspired me to pen this letter.
I’ve listened to various interviews you have done post being “caught” and, quite honestly, they all seem to share two common themes: denial and internalized struggles. It seems that not only are you denying things to others, you’re denying them to yourself resulting in deep seeded melees. It appears that you are trying to convince, not your listeners, of your sexuality, but yourself. I don’t listen to you through my physical ear, I allow myself to hear you with my spiritual ear.
Mr. Cee, I don’t wish for you to come running out of a closet as an out and proud queer black man. But I do wish for you to consider these two quotes:
The authentic self is soul made visible. - Sarah Ban Breathnach
No legacy is so rich as honesty. - Shakespeare
Given your profound impact on music as one of the country’s most well-known and skillful hip-hop DJs and radio personality at one of the country’s most famous radio stations, it’s safe to say that you desire to leave a rich legacy. I also believe that given your response to the allegations, it’s safe to say that you may benefit from giving thought to what I like to call ‘the other side of fear’.
Everything you want is on the other side of fear. Affirmation, success, love, amazing sex with those who you are truly attracted, wealth, etc. But you must choose the rich legacy of honesty to experience it. I argue that (aside from messages around masculinity, sexuality, patriarchy, etc.) you choose fear because you cannot fathom any good coming from acknowledging all of who you are. All you imagine is the negative backlash, possibly losing your job, messing up existing relationships, etc. so you choose fear. But I assure you, standing in your truth will provide you with more amazingness than your current situation ever could. Accepting who you are ALL OF WHO YOU ARE, will bring you a life beyond anything you could have dreamed of. Additionally, the world needs you. But it needs you as the authentic Calvin LeBrun. He needs to come through in order for us to ‘Cee’ your greatness. (You see what I did there?)
I applaud you for attempting to uphold what you know because it has served us, but I challenge you to explore your truth because it will serve YOU.
In solidarity & Love,
Just a Brown Queer Boi Tryna Live an Authentic Life
a/k/a ‘The Ignant Intellectual’
]]>Like, literally.
Word to the body who put you here. Peace to her mind, her body, soul and/or memory. Peace to the canals that expanded and did enough to welcome you. The ones who breathed on your behalf before your lungs existed. Peace to the body that gave you space. Blessed be their journeys to liberation and freedom. Blessed be your legacy regardless of where it placed you at the starting line. I am glad you're here. Word to life. And infinite thanks.
-mo
]]>click here to RSVP
]]>
bklyn boihood seeks a
SPRING.SUMMER'13 INTERN!
DEADLINE: May 1, 2013 | SUBMIT: info@bklynboihood.com
Are you a boi of color and/or ally who is 18+ in/near bklyn? Intern with us this Spring.Summer!
Between May 15-Sept 15 we'll need you several days a week (max. 3) and more if you're down. We promise to keep you well-read and well-fed. :P
We're searching for interns who are nice with:
film/editing * blogging/writing * bookkeeping * scheduling * social media * events * organizing data * photography * fundraising * networking * logistics * merchandising * graphics/web
Interested? Along with a short little cover letter either:
Make us a video or send us a resume or both!
We'll hit you up by May 15th. :)
Thank youuuu! <3, the bois
]]>
click to RSVP
"The more I do work in Black LGBT space, the more compelled I feel to debunk the myth that Black people don’t give and don’t invest in their own. Community doesn’t build itself. And if we want to create and sustain the resources that are for us and by us, we have to invest in them." -Kim McLeod, Founder of Elixher Magazine
TWITTER: @ELIXHERMagazine | DONATE TO ELIXHER'S DIGITAL MAGAZINE CAMPAIGN HERE!
Who doesn't love Kimberley McLeod ? Her work is everywhere right now, like here and here. Here too. She's the phenomenal founder of Elixher Magazine (elixher.com), Communications Director for the National Black Justice Coalition, a writer with features in Ebony.com and GLAAD...and the list goes on.
More than any of that, Kim gets a super-special shout out from bklyn boihood because she's been repping us from the jump. From calendars to parties and fundraisers--she takes time to sit down and put in work to get the word out about our work.
Thank you for your ongoing support + love, Kim!
So people tell you to give.
YOU SHOULD! GIVE!
But for queer people of color--people for whom historically money has not always been as readily available--donating can feel challenging or burdensome. We asked Kim a bunch of questions about fundraising in our community and she gave us great feedback (and food for thought). Before you read any further though, watch this video from her to us (and you!) that is very amazing and lovely:
From Kimberley McLeod, Founder of ELIXHER.COM:
The more I do work in Black LGBT space, the more compelled I feel to debunk the myth that Black people don’t give and don’t invest in their own. Community doesn’t build itself. And if we want to create and sustain the resources that are for us and by us, we have to invest in them.
The community has played a critical role. I feel like we’ve built ELIXHER together—from our contributing writers to community partners that continue to signal boost our work and our cause. ELIXHER is surrounded by loyal supporters that affirm and validate our existence. I’m so humbled by it all.
Black Lesbians United has been religiously posting about the campaign to their 43,000 plus Facebook followers. Jeanette, one of their organizers, is just incredible. Her unwavering support has meant more than I can express. I recently wrote about this amazing community of black sisterfriends that surrounds me. Jeanette is one of those. Before you can finish asking for help, she moves to action.
Some friends and ELIXHER contributors have organized “giving circles” with targeted fundraising goals.
Janet Mock has been such an avid supporter. She was our first funder and has been spreading the word.
Autostraddle recently did a feature on ELIXHER and the campaign. They’ve also contributed. GLAAD will be running an ELIXHER interview for Women’s History Month. Sistah Sinema and Say I Do! Wedding Expo have both partnered with ELIXHER to donate a portion of their sales to the campaign.
The list goes on.
It truly takes a village to raise money. And I’m so grateful to my village behind me.
When LGBT folks of color proudly say they donated and invested in causes they help model giving behavior. Sure, LGBT people of color might not have the means to give at the level of their white counterparts, but most of us have the means to buy that drink at the club or that latte in the morning. I want to be a part of radically shifting how we view philanthropy and supporting our own.
It’s about values and priorities. It was difficult for me as a person of color to even ask for help, to ask for people to invest in my project. There’s this culture in the Black community where we put up this façade like we have all our shit together and don’t need help from anyone. But we do. We need each other and that’s a beautiful thing.
(What's next for ELIXHER?)
Continued growth.
This phase of fundraising is the first of many steps to make ELIXHER self-sustainable. At the tail end of the campaign, you can expect our DC launch. There will be a big unveiling of the digital publication. We’ll also be celebrating our 2-year anniversary. Brooklyn’s very own DJ Mursi Layne will be spinning and I encourage my Brooklyn folks to come out. It’s on Saturday, March 30 at Tabaq. Check out the Facebook event for details.
You can also expect the launch of ELIXHER Magazine in April. AzMarie Livingston from America’s Next Top Model is our Spring cover girl. We’ll also be undergoing a website redesign and opening an online store for merchandise.
I’m excited for this next chapter of ELIXHER. 2013 is going to be a big year for us and for our community. -KM
We love you Kim! We got your back and know for sure that thousands of dollars are headed your way. Thank you for your hard work. <3, the bois
DONATE TO THE ELIXHER INDIEGOGO CAMPAIGN HERE!
]]>
The Black LGBT Emerging Leaders Initiative identifies young, rising stars (ages 18-30) in the Black LGBT movement and encourages the use of their voice to build networks and take action in their communities.
Check out our intern Kai's recap on 20-hours of awesome on the Hill (where no, sadly, we did not see Olivia Pope).
(l-r Mo, Ryann, Kai, Jckee)
(Thanks to the NBJC and The White House --- and the random lady who took our pic!)
]]>
By: The Ignant Intellectual
This blog post is a result of FB conversation in a secret group that I am in. The group appears to be primarily composed of trans-identified folk. The question was around 'studs' who prefer masculine pronouns and to be referred to as 'daddy'.
---------------------------
My response:
How can we expect to have a spectrum within trans-communities, if we are incessantly forcing people to look ONE way. or be ONE way. If every trans-masculine person was on T, how is there ever to be a diversity...a spectrum? If every person of trans experiences, identified as trans-man or trans-woman, what's the point. It's really all about others feeling comfortable. and that's not ok.
What I observe in my trans-experiences is that many of the groups in the alphabet soup, simply re-create heterosexual paradigms.
In the heterosexual world, you have males, females, and middle sex folk. Men and women are the primary representations and middle sex folk are mocked. The standard is men being paired with women. Anything else is shunned. Two men together is demonized and two women together is eroticized/objectified for the consumption of men.
Within Lesbian communities, you have femmes and studs as the primary and most validated representations. Stems are accused of being confused (mocked). The standard pairing is femme and stud. Two studs together are shunned. Two femmes together are eroticized/objectified for the consumption of masculinity.
This is simply a re-creation of heterosexual norms. And if it's damaging in those communities, what makes us think it won't be damaging in ours.
Within trans communities, we are forced to play roles and exist from scripts. we are expected to be trans, explore a lil bit our inner desires and the why behind our identity, get on t, identify as males, get our gender markers changed, get a name change which is often some derivative of our female names, hustle for money to hack our boobs off, pack, and date/marry a femme. And if we don't, we are told that we need to see a psychiatrist and/or that our reasonings for certain actions are immature and not well thought out.
So much so that you have trans folk writing blogs about what a 'real man' is. FOH.
Trans-masculine folk do not have a hegemonic grasp on non-feminine pronouns. I know someone that is female-bodied, has a voice as high as a soprano, boobs, long hair and identifies as male. He presents as a stud but is **obviously** not a bio-male. He prefers masculine pronouns. And you know what? it's not up to me or anyone else to tell HIM that HE should be referred to as SHE simply because HE has boobs, is not on T, and his presentation is somewhat feminine. it is hard for me? Sure. i am socialized and conditioned just like anyone else. But it's also not ok for me to say, yo, this is hard for me so let me refer to you as she. FOH.
We MUST expand our thinking. Or we will continue to be a dog chasing its tail. Getting absolutely nowhere.
I have said it before, and I will say it again. To TRANScend gender means that my gender is not tied to my genitals. It means that sex is not tied to my birth-assigned sex. it means that my ‘doing gender’ TRANScends a binary. it means that if at 7am, i am giving you boy, that’s 7am but if at 7pm, i’m giving you girl, that’s 7pm. And at 7pm, I should not be bound by what was happening at 7am. It means that every minute of everyday, i am evolving and changing and revolving and ebbing and flowing. It means that I own my identity and I don’t have to ‘pick a lane’. It means that I let my dates open doors for me and pull out chairs for me. It means that I am keenly aware of my masculine privilege and work tirelessly at not abusing it. It means that YOU don’t get to genderize me based on YOUR ideas of what gender is. it means that men have vaginas and girls have penises. It means that you are just going to have to get over it. it means that I CHOOSE my gender based on MY comfort level. it means that i am all that gender is and all that it is not.
Thank you for listening to my semi-organized rant.
Light & Love,
The Ignant Intellectual
--
The Ignant Intellectual is a New Orleans-reared writer, poet, and spoken word artist who has been writing before completely mastering the English language. From the accent to that je ne sais quoi that folk have been trying to put words to for far too long, to the curious name, The Ignant Intellectual is indeed a 'strange fruit'. I.I.'s goal in writing and performing is to deconstruct the many unconscious social constructions that guide our mental processes and ultimately our actions, to influence youth and elders to re-imagine what is, pushing/pulling the collective to our full potential. The Ignant Intellectual's vibrant, often humorous, and always though-provoking writings and performances convey that, "Life really is good enough to be true." And so it is.
Facebook: www.facebook.com/ignantintellectual
Twitter: @ignantintellect
Blog: ignantintellectual.tumblr.com
Radio Show: queer2thet.blogspot.com
Email: ignantintellectual@gmail.com
This question has popped up in my head more than once. I’ve often pushed it aside because I just didn’t feel like giving thought to it or because I knew that it would require me to delve and dissect and like most, I sometimes run from the reflective work. GASP! Yes, even me…sociology on legs. So I finally sat down and thought this through after watching Episode 2 of The Peculiar Kind. And so far (as this thought process is in its infancy), I am realizing that, for once, the absence of a plethora of male role models in my life has actually been a gift.
I was raised in a single parent home with my mother. Next door lived my grandmother and uncle. He was so busy chasing a bottle of Pepto Bismol with a pint of Wild Irish Rose that he hardly had time to notice anything. Sure there were some men at church and a male family member here and there, but like many of us, I had few males in my immediate life. In analyzing ‘how I learned to be masculine’, I’ve realized that the absence of males in my life was of great benefit. For, it allowed me to create versus model.
I really have no clue ‘how to be masculine’ in the socially, stereotypically defined way. My ‘doing gender’ is an amalgam of a select few external forces and myself; moreso myself. I’ve always viewed masculinity quite differently from ‘most people’. And I never understood why, until just now. I would listen to conflations of and expansions of masculinity described in ways that I just couldn’t connect with. I wondered if it was because I was raised in a single parent home or because I just had never peeled apart the layers of gender presentation/expression in a way that revealed to me just where I learned to ‘be masculine’. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. But unlike the crux of most conversations, I felt something positive in my connection with masculinity, its creation, and ultimate expression.
I’ve been having these thoughts surrounding the concept of choice that I am sure will evolve to a more detailed blog post, but regarding being masculine, I am noticing that in that space, I felt like I had choice. I didn’t have the language to say that then, but at 33, I realize that I’ve pretty much always created my ebb and flow inside and outside of gender. Sure there were moments where I tried to fit in, but they lasted ‘bout as long as a pizza in a boys’ locker room. I think it took me so long to pinpoint this benefit of having limited examples of men in my life because I am human and I am conditioned. And some of that conditioning can be found within the framework of what’s been coined as ‘doing gender’. 
I knew that I was always ‘weird’ about gender expression. I knew that I never felt much pressure to be like everyone else. But I didn’t know where I got my masculine aura from and how I ‘did’ it. I realize now that I get it from my mama ME!!! I created it. And it suits me. I’m often told that I’m inspiring because I’m very unapologetic in who I am which is humbling. I am glad that I devoted thought to this finally. I am also glad that for once ‘not having a positive male role model’ was actually of benefit. As I am typing I am also seeing that being from a ‘broken home’ has been of benefit as well as it provides me the blank canvas that allows me to ‘create my dream relationship’. I don’t have a (fucked up) blue print by which I’m expected to model. (YEAH FOR BROKEN HOMES!!)
About The Ignant Intellectual...
The Ignant Intellectual is a New Orleans-reared writer, poet, and spoken word artist who has been writing before completely mastering the English language. From the accent to that je ne sais quoi that folk have been trying to put words to for far too long, to the curious name, The Ignant Intellectual is indeed a 'strange fruit'. I.I.'s goal in writing and performing is to deconstruct the many unconscious social constructions that guide our mental processes and ultimately our actions, to influence youth and elders to re-imagine what is, pushing/pulling the collective to our full potential. The Ignant Intellectual's vibrant, often humorous, and always though-provoking writings and performances convey that, "Life really is good enough to be true." And so it is.
FB/Tumblr: ignantintellectual |Twitter: @ignantintellect | Radio: queer2thet.blogspot.com |Email: ignantintellectual@gmail.com
]]>
As a collective we've changed so many ways since our beginning. We've grown, shifted, matured, expanded, upgraded and on and on. Our goal is to create a space that fosters the best in each of us. Genesis, co-founder of bklyn boihood has been critical to that journey. Gen is a lot of amazing things; an artist, a teacher, a mentor, a dear friend and so much more. But change is upon us and she's taking focusing on her art, her profession and the next stop on her life-flight. For the whole collective, she's inspired us to seek our higher selves, be honest with our complexities and embrace the ways we can be better human beings.
WE LOVE YOU GEN! Check out a vid from her below.
]]>